Certified Parenting Coach

62. Where we went

Good evening, family, friends, and readers. We disappeared. We folded into ourselves and our home due to stress and trauma taking over. I ended up having to take a break from work due to stress and our kiddos struggles were real. That is where we are. Foster care isn’t always sunshine and roses; in fact, it isn’t most days. Many days trauma jumps up and bites you in your places you were not paying attention to only to have you settle that down and have it jump up in a different place. You are not alone. We are not alone. Find your group. I am starting a support group in my local area. If there isn’t one where you are, start one! Drive to find one. Talk to your friends and family. If there isn’t a group for them, invite them to come to the greater Milwaukee area to my group for friends and family of foster parents.

Continue reading “62. Where we went”

Taking placement

60. The different “levels” of foster care- foster parents

Hello, All! Mama S here. Thank you for coming along on our journey. Today I’m going to break down Mama A’s and my “level” as it relates to fostering. Before we get into what our level is, it is important to have an understanding of what all the levels are. Continue reading “60. The different “levels” of foster care- foster parents”

Precocious

59. A slight window in how multiple moves have shaped our kiddos

Mama S here! Have you ever packed up all your belongings and moved to a different home? Did you do it alone and sever all ties to people/things/places in the process? This is what foster kiddos are doing every day and doing so leaves marks on their soul that are very hard and slow to heal. Continue reading “59. A slight window in how multiple moves have shaped our kiddos”

Precocious

56. Should we require appreciation from our kiddos?

Mama S here. I have seen an article being widely spread that speaks about how foster children shouldn’t be required to be grateful for everything the foster family does for them. That the foster family signs up for caring for kiddos from hard places and that they shouldn’t expect their foster kids to appreciate what they do for them. I’ve been sitting with that for a bit and I have to say that, while I partially agree, I also strongly disagree. Continue reading “56. Should we require appreciation from our kiddos?”

Little V · Uncategorized

17. Saying Goodbye

Dear V,

Know that you were fought for. The first home you came into when you left your parent’s home loved you dearly. We enlisted the help of advocates, reached out to supervisor’s supervisors, we sent so many emails, and in the end it wasn’t enough. You were made to leave our home. When you left, you took the biggest pieces of our hearts we had. Your smile brightened our days and your tears tugged at our heart strings. We celebrated the smallest of achievements and adjusted our lives to bend to meet your needs and for your well-being. Was it hard? Yes. You are worth it. You are worth every tear, every moment of angst we experienced when trying to keep you, the biggest heartbreak we have ever experienced. You are worth it all. Don’t forget to celebrate the little things with your big smile and clapping. The world is hard and you deserve to celebrate those wins. We will miss you every day and think of you often. We are thankful for what you have brought into our lives and the love you were also so willing to give.

Never forget you deserve the world and that you were fought for.

All the love in the world,

Mama S

Little V · Uncategorized

14. Why does he keep hitting himself?

“Why are you hitting yourself?” I’ve found myself asking this question out loud and following it up with an empathetic look and a “It’s OK if you are having big feelings. Big hugs to help you feel better.”  We have had the privilege/ sadness to see first hand what childhood trauma does to developing brains. It changes these kiddos in big ways that are hard to understand. I have found myself reading everything I can get my hands on to help me understand what is happening to this little man we have in our care. I was reading on the www.ntscm.org page and this quote explained things clearly:


Continue reading “14. Why does he keep hitting himself?”